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理解生活的真实:英语的!

以英语的视角,看看人生:)
money is not everything. there‘s mastercard & visa.
   钞票不是万能的,有时还需要信用卡.
  
   one should love animals. they are so tasty.
   每个人都应该热爱动物,因为它们很好吃.
  
   save water. shower with your girlfriend.
   要节约用水,尽量和女友一起洗澡.
  
   love the neighbor. but don‘t get caught.
   要用心去爱你的邻居,不过不要让她的老公知道.
  
   behind every successful man, there is a woman. and behind every
   unsuccessful man, there are two.
   每个成功男人的背后,都有一个女人. 每个不成功男人的背后, 都有两个.
  
   every man should marry. after all, happiness is not the only thing in life.
   再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚,幸福不是永久的嘛.
  
   the wise never marry, and when they marry they become otherwise.
   聪明人都是未婚的,结婚的人很难再聪明起来.
  
   success is a relative term. it brings so many relatives.
   成功是一个相关名词,他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚(联系).
  
   never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today.
   不要等明天交不上差再找借口, 今天就要找好.
  
   love is photogenic. it needs darkness to develop.
   爱情就象照片,需要大量的暗房时间来培养. (老外也保守,要摸黑办事,哈哈)
  
   children in backseats cause accidents. accidents in backseats cause children.
   后排座位上的小孩会生出意外, 后排座位上的意外会生出小孩.
  
   your future depends on your dreams. so go to sleep.
   现在的梦想决定着你的将来,所以还是再睡一会吧.
  
   there should be a better way to start a day than waking up every morning.
   应该有更好的方式开始新一天,而不是千篇一律的在每个上午都醒来.
  
   hard work never killed anybody. but why take the risk?
   努力工作不会导致死亡!不过我不会用自己去证明.
  
   work fascinates me. i can look at it for hours!
   工作好有意思耶!尤其是看着别人工作.
  
   god made relatives; thank god we can choose our friends.
   神决定了谁是你的亲戚,幸运的是在选择朋友方面他给了你留了余地.
  
   when two‘s company, three‘s the result!
   两个人的状态是不稳定的,三个人才是!
  
   a dress is like a barbed fence. it protects the premises without restricting the view.
   服饰就象铁丝网,它阻止你冒然行动但并不妨碍你尽情的观看.
  
   the more you learn, the more you know, the more you know, the more you forget. the more you forget, the less you know. so why bother to learn.
   学的越多,知道的越多, 知道的越多,忘记的越多, 忘记的越多,知道的越少,为什么学来着?!谁了解女人? 

  the nice women are ugly.
  好女人不漂亮。
  
  the beautiful women are not nice.
  漂亮女人不好。
  
  the beautiful and nice women are general stupid.
  又漂亮又好的女人一般都很愚蠢。
  
  the beautiful, nice and clever women are married.
  又漂亮又好又不愚蠢的女人都结婚了。
  
  the women who are not so beautiful but are nice women are born in poverty.
  不是很漂亮但是很好的女人都出身贫寒。
  
  the women who are not so beautiful but are nice women born in noble think we areonly after their lordliness.
  不是很漂亮但是很好又出身高贵的女人会认为我们看上的是他们的权势。
  
  the beautiful women without lordliness are after our lordliness.
  而没有权势但是很漂亮的女人看上的是我们的权势。
  
  com the clever women, who are not so nice and somewhat beautiful don‘t think we are clever enough.
  不是很好但是很漂亮又很聪明的女人却嫌我们不够聪明。
  
  the women who think we are clever, that are nice, somewhat clever and have lordliness have a lot of pursuers.
  又好又聪明又出身高贵又觉得我们聪明的女人都有很多追求者。
  
  the women who are somewhat beautiful, somewhat nice and have some lordliness and thank god are clever are always maintain many candidates!!!!!
  又好又漂亮又出身高贵而且又聪明的女人总是脚踩几条船。
  
  the women who always maintain many candidates, automatically complain us when westand off them.
  那些脚踩几条船的女人一旦我们疏远她们就对我们充满怨言抱怨。
  
  now,who in the hell understands women?
  现在,到底有谁了解女人这东西?

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